Deliver us from Evil

So last night Nat Geo had a special on about the Holocaust, and in it they were showing an album that was delivered to the Holocaust Museum in D.C. The album shows Nazi’s doing regular things, and laughing and smiling. The commentators were explaining that the album depicts these Nazi’s as people rather than monsters. That they had no horns or pointy tails, like you would expect from monsters doing what they did. I do not know what fantasy world those people live in, but monsters in reality come in only one form; ours. No, those Nazi’s were not regular people. Just because they were shown having a good time, smiling or partying; does not make them regular people. They were monsters! No regular person would behave like that or condone such actions.

I find it also ironic all these shows can talk about the Holocaust, but rarely touch on the subject of the brutality of Stalin, or Mousilini, or others in that same time period. Hitler was vicious, but so were the others. There ought to be documentation of every wicked government on the Earth no matter when or how small. Humanity can be the most cruel being around. It also can be the most loving and kind as well.

Now the point of this post is, where is god? I have only ever been to a few churches and in each the prayer is spoken with these words “…and Deliver us from Evil..”, so I have to wonder again where was god? Over One Million Jews were killed viciously by the Nazis during WWII. These are “god’s Chosen People”, yet where was he during this? Surely they were calling out to him to “deliver us from evil”. Yet they were not; they were separated from family members, humiliated, experimented on and then killed.

As I said earlier, Stalin would slaughter many of his own people. They would be dragged from their beds in the middle of the night, taken out and shot. “deliver us from evil” Where was he then?

Men who walk in to a busy market center and push a button that detonates a bomb they are wearing, kills many people and injuries scores more. These same type of people hijack planes and ram them into buildings. They slaughter their own people for no other reason than because they believe differently. “deliver us from evil” where was god then?

For thousands of years in Africa warring tribes would kill one another, and destroy neighboring villages. A strong tribe would prey on a weak one, kill many then sell the rest to greedy white men for slavery. “deliver us from evil”. Where was god then?

A vile man comes across a woman walking alone, uses his strength to over power her and rapes her while she screams out to god for help. “deliver us from evil” A father feels dishonored by his daughter and kills her in what is labeled “an honor killing”, and she is also calling for help. “deliver us from evil”, where was he then?

That is from some things I have seen in my life, others have seen far worse and also ask the same thing: Where is god in all this? But if you read the Bible you see far worse things than what man has done. God has done many a terrible thing: Click to see. It was these things that turned me from Christianity, not a church, or actions of one or two individuals. And not just the incidences listed above, no I left because of what I read. I have had some tell me that the Bible is merely metaphorical and not to be taken literally. Others have told me that the the bible is literal and truthful. Either way I cannot see following ANY religion that teaches such violence and hatred. And I also cannot see how so many willingly overlook it themselves. Of course that may be because those people have not read the entire book themselves, only listened to sermons on Sunday. Most preachers/priests leave out the horrors of what god did.

Thus it is easy for me to see why so many people are turned off by religion period and become Atheists. I cannot myself look around at nature, the universe, and believe there is no intelligence behind it all. That is why I am Deist, I believe in a creator, but not one that has ever interacted with people. Just one that set things in motion and let things be, left it to us to decide how to take care of creation and each other. Thus far we are doing rather poorly at the job.

Mostly the reason I am still saddened by not being in a church is because that is how we are taught; to rely on that group mentality, of unity and fellowship.  We are asked to read the bible, yet few do. Why should they read, they have someone they trust to tell them what they need to know. Yet it is this same person who leaves out the cruelty of god, the insanity of his rules.  I don’t believe, because I am one of those few who read the bible (granted not all of it) and just could not condone the actions of that god.

http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/cruelty/ot_list.html

Religion lost, belief found.

Ok, so once I believed in Christianity. I think it may have been because it is what you are expected to believe, just like in olden days if you lived in Rome, you believed in the Roman gods & goddesses. I first started out in a Southern Baptist church that I barely remember as it was where my parents took us. Then when we moved out of Texas and moved to Arizona the first time around, we did not actually go to church, and I really do not know why. I guess my parents weren’t really religious. Well, then after we lost everything due to their habits, we moved to Nevada in Henderson for a short time and this nice family took us in. We went to the Salvation Army church they had for a bit, then when we got our own place we stopped going to church yet again.

After a fashion we moved back to Arizona to Glendale and lived in an Apartment. Again I will tell you we didn’t go to church. Now as you might imagine one not growing up in a non-religious atmosphere, that I did not feel as if those I was missing out on any thing. When I moved out on my own, and got my own apartment, for some reason I had a notion that I ought to go to church again.

At first it was good, I volunteered to come in before service and straighten bibles and hymnals. Occasionally I made it in on Saturdays to do some cleaning. I even at one point helped make up communion, at which point I would help pass it out during service. I felt great, and welcome there. So much so that I decided to be baptized there. Yet I never felt anything, never once was there a “connection” to god. Soon the church was involved in internal politics (no not the Dem vs. Rep kind), first there was another church that had petitioned to join the Denomination (Disciples of Christ). One problem, this church did not denounce Homosexuality, in fact the had the audacity (sarcasm) to minister to them! Well, at a church meeting about it, and the possibility of gays coming to our church for ministry, caused such a fraction that I could not believe it! We weren’t asked to perform marriages for them, or have sex or something, yet the people in my church got into shouting matches and used rather hateful language. Shortly after the meeting everyone went to the “Fellowship Hall” for dinner, at this point I looked around and could not believe that these people were the same people who just argued and lost control a few moments before. I could not believe that the message of Salvation on pertained to those who were perfect!

Second the church elders decided that the pastor Micro-managed too much and booted him out. We had an interim pastor come through that made it quite clear where he stood on the issue of Homosexuality. I don’t know about the vote, I left before it took place I guess, I didn’t care after that. I would also point out that it was at this point that I was struggling with my Sexuality. My mother and sister were the ones that got me out of the closet so to speak, and helped me accept who I was and gave me love.

My sister had found out about this Church over in Dallas that catered to Gay people, in fact it was a Gay church. I gave it a try and found that I enjoyed it, as I went on Saturday nights and attended the “come as you are” set up. We could dress in jeans and a T-Shirt and it did not matter. It was a relaxed setting, and I met some very nice people, and of course volunteered some. That is until several senior pastors decided that they had a problem with the pastor who gave sermons on Saturday and got rid of her, then canceled that service. The moved it to Sunday, with similar them of come as you are but not the same atmosphere. As you can guess, I did not stay long.

I eventually found my way towards Wicca. After having read the Bible and disbelieving in all the violence of the god in it, I felt I needed something else. And a friend of mine was teaching a small class and I kind of got into it. It worked for me for a time. The class eventually broke up, and I can’t remember why. But I tried staying as a solitary for sometime there after.

Of course it too never felt right, I did not have any “connection”. So I decided it was time for me to accept something that did fit with what I thought, and felt. Deism. Deism can be defined greatly and no doubt at length, But the short version is: There is a creator (god if you will) that brought everything thing in to being. However this creator does not, nor ever has interacted with humanity.I like this as there is no doctrines, there is no “holy book” that has countless acts of violence through out, and full of hypocrisy.

I miss Christianity, I miss the idea that there is a caring fatherly figure god out there that is concerned for your wellbeing. But reading the Bible has shown me violence, and lack of concern by this same god in the “old” testament. As much as I would like to pray and feel that someone is listening and answers, I know in my heart and mind that this is not true. Sometimes I wish it were, and that the bible had not been written like it was with violence, and apathy from their god. That this so-called “unchanging” god, suddenly does a 180 and decides that he cares for our wellbeing and therefore sent his “son” to die for us.

There are times that I feel the loss so much that I just want to join a church again, but as I say I remember what I have read in the Bible and that keeps me from accepting it. That god in there is not a loving god, and nothing can convince me of that. Well, this is my opinion and you can disagree strongly, but I can have my opinion.